Will Not-My-Bag Defense Work? Paris' Purse Pic Could Be Her Undoing

That sound you hear? That's the sound of an alibi unraveling.
Cast your minds back to, um, five whole days ago, when Paris Hilton was busted for cocaine possession. Her excuse? Those weren't her drugs (she thought it was gum!), that wasn't her purse (too cheap!) and the dog ate her homework.
Now try if you can to cast your mind back to a month and a half ago, when Paris posted a twitpic of a Chanel purse she had just purchased—a purse which certainly looks identical to the handbag she was apparently carrying at the time of her arrest.
           So what does it all mean?
That things aren't exactly coming up roses for the heiress.
While the Clark County District Attorney's office told E! News that the type of purse she was carrying that night was not listed in any report, there's really no denying the photos.
Not that it may end up mattering all that much, anyway.
Possession, in this case, may add up to being slightly more than 9/10s of the law.
         "She's being charged with possession, so it doesn't matter if it's hers or someone else's," Las Vegas police spokesman Officer Jay Rivera told E! News. "She's the person in possession of it, so it doesn't matter."
         Rivera also noted that this case, despite its high profile, was not treated any different than normally—which means cops did not confiscate the offending Chanel (the fashion police, on the other hand, may want to take a closer look).
          "This is a common typical arrest. We don't keep track of people's purses and we don't impound people's purses when we find evidence or contraband in them."
         Criminal defense attorney Alec Rose, who is not involved in Paris' case, went one further.
        "In my 17 years of practicing criminal defense law, I have never heard of the 'it's not my handbag defense' actually working," he told E! News. "If it is in the handbag you are using, it is a pretty hard one to explain."
         Paris, meanwhile, is laying low, albeit not online. Some people never learn.
         In the past few days, Hilton seems to have stayed busy by hanging out at home, not only with boyfriend and fellow arrestee Cy Waits, but with sister Nicky Hilton and her beau David Katzenberg.
        And judging by the number of Paris-centric fan sites she's linked on her Twitter page recently, it appears any time not spent with friends and family has been logged with her good friend, Google alert.
        Nice to know some things will never change.

Jessica Simpson Offers a Twitter Tribute to Her Pup

  While some are barbecuing and wearing as much white as possible to celebrate Labor Day, Jessica Simpson is tweeting a tribute to the one-year anniversary of her dog's death.

The singer tweeted: "This day last year my life changed because I lost my baby Daisy Mae- the best pup of all time...give your dog some extra love today!!"
A year ago Simpson was on the hunt to find her five-year-old maltipoo Daisy—named after her character in Dukes of Hazzard—that was taken by coyotes.
           Sadly, the time came when the celeb just had to say goodbye to the dog, which had been a gift from ex-husband Nick Lachey for her 24th birthday.
           Let's all hug our furry friends a little tighter today in memory of Daisy Mae Simpson

Paris Hilton: Las Vegas Police Wanted Her Out ASAP

           After Paris Hilton was arrested in Sin City last week for alleged cocaine possession, questions arose as to how she was able to get in and out of Clark County Detention Center in just three hours when the usual charge process takes about six.
          Well, it wasn't special treatment exactly.
           But different? Yes.
Authorities say they merely wanted to get the heiress out as fast as possible to avoid any chaos, not to do her any favors.
"Yeah, she was treated differently so I don't have a disruption of my process here at the county jail," Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Deputy Chief Jim Dixon told The Las Vegas Review-Journal.
          "When you bring somebody in like that, everybody comes over and tries to look at them. I'd have officers attempting to keep inmates away from her. I'd have disruptions."
However, Dixon made sure to state that just because the process was faster than normal, Hilton was still subject to all regular booking procedures.
Hilton is scheduled to appear before Las Vegas Justice of the          Peace Joe Bonaventure on Oct. 27.

Five (More) Ridiculous Lindsay Lohan Excuses

Who does Lindsay Lohan think she is, former bestie Paris Hilton and her stupid I-thought-the-coke-was-gum excuse? It was hard not to feel a little bit of sympathy for La Lohan when reading her big Vanity Fair interview. But we got over that real quick.




You see, Lindsay is the same as ever—the girl's one excuse away from getting out of gym class for good.



Fresh from V.F.'s fabulously written gospel of Ms. Lohan (cheers to the author, Nancy Jo Sales), we've extracted Lindsay's most intriguing excuses to add to our ever-growing list.



Who said the chick wasn't good at thinking on her feet?
1. "I have to support myself. I have to pay for my apartment. I have to pay for food."
Lindsay missed seven of her court-ordered classes on alcohol education, insisting that she thought she could make them up at her leisure. But it also implies that missing the classes was key to her survival. Somehow, we think making time once a week for a class isn't going to deplete a food or money supply—especially when you're making as much money as Lindsay. If that were the case, college students would be starving in university libraries, living off sips of Red Bull and half-eaten bowls of Easy Mac.
2. "These were my college years. But they were in the public eye. I was irresponsible. I was experimenting. I was doing certain things that people do 10 times more of when they're in college. And I'm not making excuses..."
We're sorry to say, but we have two interns here at the A.T. who are in college, and neither of them 'fess to knowing anyone who does 10 times more [insert Lindsay activity of choice here]. Jaded Linds is using the old "other people are doing way worse!" excuse, which doesn't really help her case. The girl who got a DUI and the boy who got 10 DUIs both still got DUIs.
3. "Everyone I knew was going out, so what was I gonna do, sit home by myself?"
Hard-core partying never looks good on anyone, especially not on club haunter Lohan. But does Lindsay really expect to get sympathy for her clubbing ways by playing the lonely girl card? We should feel bad that she just can't stand it to stay in and watch a movie! No, no, no! If she's going to keep her friends, she must not sit home by herself! And how dare we expect her to!
4. "I was 18, 19—with a ton of money—and no one really here to tell me that I couldn't do certain things..."
Chalk this one up to tugging out heartstrings. We actually think this one's less of an excuse and more of a pained confession. Lindsay, sadly, never had a stable support system. As the article goes on to report, Lindsay's temper tantrums would result in mom Dina doing "whatever she wanted her to." Score one on the accurate excuse chart for Linds.
5. "I was young and curious and thought it was like, OK, 'cause other people were doing it and other people put it in front of me."
It's probably true. But life is full of peer pressure, and one can only blame others for one's misjudgments so many times. After all, it's one thing to have something put in front of you once, but every repetition becomes more and more the fault of the offender. Dabble away, Lindsay—it's understandable, given your precarious position as a youngster influenced by the perils of Young Hollywood. But know that it ain't just other people to blame.
Bonus!
6. "'I think the root of her problem,' said one of her friends, 'was every single person telling her how amazing she is, kissing her ass all the time. It was like, If everyone thinks I'm the s--t, then I must be.' "
We're including this one, by one of Lindsay's anonymous pals, just because of how true this must be. Lindsay, baby, we understand you more and more each day.
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Caption AnnaLynne McCord's Mile-High Muumuu

                Calling all couture cops—it's YOU Write 'Em Up time!

                The Perp: 90210 starlet AnnaLynne McCord, at Los Angeles airport
                  Nobody expects celebs to rock Louis Vuitton and their Louboutins when flying the friendly skies (though plenty do), but AnnaLynne looks like she's headed to the Del Boca    Vista retirement home in this loud muumuu. Sweetie, if you wanted to be comfortable, you could've just worn sweatpants.
            What do you think of the star's flying apparatus? Write a clever caption below and we'll post our fave here and on our Facebook page.

Shhhh! One of TV's Best-Loved Couples Is Getting Married...See Who It Is Right Now!

Oh, happy day!

One of TV's fan-favorite couples is getting hitched in just a few short weeks, and right now, at long last, I can reveal the bride and groom.

They are:
 

Cristina (Sandra Oh) and Owen (Kevin McKidd) of ABC's Grey's Anatomy!

           Yep, they are the couple who will be getting engaged—and hitched—in the Sept. 23 season premiere, which will jump ahead two months in the storyline.
            It's gonna be fantastic—and romantic!—but, mind you, not everything has been flowers and sunshine for "Crowen" since we last saw them.
            One source tells me that Cristina will be one of three doctors held back from returning to surgery (buzz kill!) by the new therapist at Seattle Grace (James Tupper), because Ms. Yang is still coping with some post-traumatic stress from the shootout in last May's season finale, and because she's been too preoccupied with all that wedding planning. Take note, kids: Bride brain + scalpels = don't mix.
             You know what this means, right? The love triangle with Teddy (Kim Raver) is so officially dead and buried, and cremated, and thrown out to sea. In fact, Teddy will be cozying up to James Tupper's character in the new season. Hot!
             As for you fans who were rooting for a Sarah and Chuck wedding (they were the other remaining couple in our marriage guessing game), all I can say is, you can certainly consider this good news, because it means neither NBC nor show runners Chris Fedak or Josh Schwartz are planning on ending the series anytime soon. (Anyone else agree that would probably be the signal of the end?) Plus, I'm still hearing that        Sarah and Chuck will be going strong—whether or not she becomes a Bartowski.
          Now you can post all your "I knew it!"s and well wishes for the bride and groom in the comments section down below. Are you happy it's Cristina and Owen?
         Also, please note: This is totally a sole exclusive scoop that you cannot read anywhere else on the web at this time. No, really! Don't even bother checking the competitors' sites! It's not like we had a pact or anything...That would be insane.



________

Follow me on Twitter @kristindsantos for more TV scoop and because it's never bad luck to see the bride before the wedding when it comes to your favorite shows!

Kardashians Debut K-Dash for QVC Clothing Line

      The Kardashians are one fashion-forward step closer to total world domination.

       Kim, Kourtney, Khloé and matriach Kris are soon launching their K-Dash by Kardashian for QVC clothing line. The collection, which includes casual-chic dresses, belts, handbags, leggings and jackets ranging from $20-$240, will debut on Sept. 10 during QVC's Fashion's Night Out—Live From Rockefeller Center.
       The sisters gave a sneak peek of their wares recently while hanging out in L.A. Click in for more Kardashian-designed klothes...

So what do you think—if the Kardashians are selling, are you buying?